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The Ramblings of a Redneck Diva
Wednesday, January 19, 2005
So hard to understand
Mood:  sad
Topic: Things in life that suck
My great-uncle Homer was killed in a car accident yesterday afternoon. It's a horrible shock to all of us and we're all reeling. My great-grandparents had three kids - Leo, Homer and Edith. Leo is my Papa. He's not handling this very well, obviously. Sis, Mom, Paul and I stayed in at his house till after 10 last night just being with him and his wife. He didn't want us to go. God, it makes me so sad when my family is hurting and I can't fix it. Aunt Edie said to Mom yesterday, "You know, us three kids are all in our 80's and we've never had a fight. Leo and Homer are my best friends." Mom told us that and then asked, "Now, how many people can say that?" Sis and I looked at each other and said, "Not us." That was followed by tears.

I was having a bit of a pity party for myself yesterday afternoon anyway. I had tried to watch a movie and no one would let me. I was getting madder and madder by the minute over things that were so trivial and I was being very immature. Finally I turned off the movie, stomped off to the kitchen to start dinner. The phone rang and it was Mom. I was talking to her about how I'd applied for a job that morning and how I was confused and torn and nervous (I haven't had a job in 10 years) and then just all of the sudden she said, "Someone's here! Gotta go!" I was crushed. She wasn't paying attention to me? How dare. My already fired up temper just snapped and I slammed down the phone, ran to my bedroom, flopped onto my bed and began crying, no sobbing. Now yes, I realize I was acting like a teenager. I don't know what came over me. I was hurt, confused, angry, sad, and I couldn't stop crying. I heard the phone ring up front and I ignored it. I figured Paul or the machine would get it. Ab came in with the phone and I came very close to just telling her to take it to her daddy, but I didn't. Mom said, "Are you sitting down?" Now, normally my rather playful mother will preempt a wacky, wild and rather gossipy statement with "Are you sitting down?" Sadly, yesterday she really needed me to be sitting down because the next thing out of her mouth was the news about Uncle Homer. I cannot begin to describe how I felt at that moment. My poor mother was wracked with sobs and I hurt so badly for her at that moment. She told me everything she knew then hung up to call Sis. I went up front and fell into Paul's arms, managing to get the words out through sobs. Now, that man is not know for his compassion and sympathy, but I will have to give him credit. He was amazing. Keeping me centered, making phone calls for me, helping with the kids... I am grateful to him today. I managed to get a sitter over here, called Chandler's mom and got him taken care of and then we went to town to be with Mom and Papa.

My Papa is a very unexpressive man. I was 20 years old before he ever told me he loved me. My mother was in her 40's before he ever told her. That's just Papa. He's a kind man and very well-known in our area as a good and honest person. Makes me proud to be a Glenn. But to see my tiny, 100 pound grandfather sitting on the couch, looking every bit of defeated and just plain sad, was about all I could take. When he looked at me face-on, the tear running down his cheek just about did me in and I wanted nothing more than to just curl up in his arms and make him better. I am so glad that we were there to keep him company last night. He needed us and we needed him.

The evening was a mixture of laughter and tears. We told stories, listened to Papa tell stories and when Heather told the barrel of chicken story about Uncle Homer we all laughed then cried. We watched the news at 10 and saw what they had to say. That house was suddenly as quiet as a Monday morning church. Then we all cried some more.

Mom needs us to bring the kids in to Papa's tonight. Papa needs them. She needs them. We all need each other.

Please send our family your thoughts and prayers this week.

The Diva has spoken at 9:15 AM CST
Updated: Wednesday, January 19, 2005 9:20 AM CST

Wednesday, January 19, 2005 - 12:19 PM CST

Name: Tiff

Hey chicka,
Sorry to hear about your Uncle. If you need
me to come down this weekend to babysit, let
me know. (I won't even charge you :) ) But
seriously, let me know if there's anything
I can do. I'll be praying for you and the fam.
love

Thursday, January 20, 2005 - 6:21 AM CST

Name: Tracy Stone Johnston

Oh Kristin...I am so very sorry to have read about your great-uncle. Please know that I love all of you so very much and you are in my prayers. I wish I lived closer so I could help out any way that I could...I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face because I know how it feels to lose loved ones. I'm only a phone call away if you need someone to listen to you. I will.
Tracy

Thursday, January 20, 2005 - 6:21 AM CST

Name: Tracy Stone Johnston

Oh Kristin...I am so very sorry to have read about your great-uncle. Please know that I love all of you so very much and you are in my prayers. I wish I lived closer so I could help out any way that I could...I'm sitting here with tears streaming down my face because I know how it feels to lose loved ones. I'm only a phone call away if you need someone to listen to you. I will.
Tracy

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